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Name/Age/Location: Rachele Morgan. 21. Lancaster County, PA
Child's gender/Age: Hailey Rhiannon. Female. 6months (4-16-08)
Why you feel that raising an only child is for you: She wasn't exactly a planned baby. I hated being pregnant and I don't want to deal with 2 girls ;) My Husband doesn't want anymore kids and is even considering a vasectomy(sp?). We had said if the baby was a boy we'd go for number 2 when they were fully potty trained. I always wanted a boy 1st to protect his little sister, that type of thing. Haha. And I'm sure it's also a major money issue on my Husband's side of things as well. Not having to decide to go to her event or her siblings. Not having to divide ourselves so someone is always there for our children. There's probably other things, but that's the jist.
The pros of raising an only child: Spending all your love/attention/money on 1 little person giving her everything she wants with no regrets or worries.
The cons of raising an only child: Loneliness. Being bratty or over spoiled.

Sleep issues

My son is 4 and we are constantly fighting him to sleep in his own bed. We have never been a cosleeping family, but at about age 2 (big boy bed age) he started coming to our bed to sleep. Its not every night, but it is most nights. I've tried laying w/ him in his bed, letting him lay in mine. And it's not a certian time that he comes either. Some nights he just won't go to sleep in his bed, other nights he doesn't come in until early morning (2 or 3am) and some nights not at all. We have night lights so he won't be scared of the dark. I'm just at my wits end, neither my husband nor I get a good nights sleep b/c my son is a bed hog, so most nights I go to his bed or the couch. The other issue is that If my husband is on call and his phone rings in the middle of the night it wakes my son up (sometimes) same goes for the 4am alarm clock. The worst part is I love cuddling w/ him in my bed, so everytime he gets up he says something like " I just wanna love on mommy" How do I say no to that?!


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New Member

Name: Jenni
Age:27
Child: Gunnar
Age:4
Location: Mesa, AZ
More about me: I love children and want more but due to comlications w/ my pregnancy and other issues, Gunnar is my only one. We may adopt or do foster care at some point but for now we are raising and only the best wa ywe know how.

NEW MEMBER / INTRODUCTION

I was a single mom for a long time.

After 4 years I got pregnant and my bf left me.

When my now 5 year old was almost a year I began dating a man who passed away last year.

I have been married since shortly after his death and we are considering having another child in the next couple years - but we aren't sure.

One is enough most of the time and she would be 6 or 7 by the time we did...

I grew up the eldest of 4 (I am now 27, there is a 25 sister a 22 sister and a 17 brother) One of my closest friends is an only child and we envy each others situations... siblings - none...

That's me - - - Hope to learn some new things in this group and meet some new people!
brief article on the pros and cons of being an only child.

How much of this do you think is true? How is it possible to raise an only child who appreciates their own unique experience of life as being an only child? Of course that's the goal of this community, figuring that out for myself, but it certainly is something that I hope to achieve with my daughter.

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Hey there! New Member...

Found you guys by bouncing around and found you interesting. Here's some background on me and my family:

My name is Janet, I'm 48 years old, and I live in New Jersey. My husband and I will be married for 22 years as of next Saturday.

We were told that I was unable to have children and were looking into adoption when I found I was pregnant with Steven. I was 38 when he was born. For those of you doing the math, he is 9 years old now.

Since I was a child I wanted to have children. In my head it was always 2 with a boy first and then a girl. I'm the oldest of four - and always wanted an older brother. Now I can't imagine a family any other way. I'm looking forward to conversations and insights...

Take Care!

I'm an only child, too

I'm an only child. While I think that in some ways I've benefited from this (for example, my parents don't split time/money/love/whatever else between multiple children), ultimately I've always wished I'd had a brother and/or a sister. Being an only child can make things difficult. If your parents are fighting, you have to be the one to listen to both sides, and if your parents fight a lot, eventually you get the feeling that you just have to get away. Also, family vacations can get pretty awkward and uncomfortable at times, as it's just you and the 'rents. I have a pretty good relationship with both of my parents, but even I have my limits.

Also, some part of me thinks that some of my socialization problems may come out of my having never had brothers or sisters around, at least indirectly. Without any siblings to play with, I often had to entertain myself from an early age. Once I discovered video games and comic books, this of course became a good deal easier, though I'm not sure I did myself any favors when I discovered those, as I know I used them as something of a crutch and a place to retreat into. So instead of trying hard (and learning how) to make friends or be around them, I would always come home and play Mario or Zelda or Mega Man, or read X-Men or something along those lines. Sure, I had friends growing up, but honestly it wasn't until high school that I felt like I had friends that I really went out and did a lot with. And although I made lots of friends in college, it's still very difficult for me. However, all that is not to say that I blame my parents (who never had another child) for my uneven social development. They didn't throw the video games or comic books on me, I did that myself. They didn't stop me from making more friends or socializing more in my formative years, I pretty well did that myself. I'm just saying it didn't help not to have siblings around. And it's definitely up to me to keep working on fixing those personal problems.

I think I had more to say, but I've forgotten it all. I'll post to this group again if I remember.

Good group, Kassi. Thanks for creating it and giving the HeadsUp!